Broken
by The Duckster
Summary: Missing moment. Hermione's reactions after Ron has returned to them on the Horcrux hunt as well as a missing moment of Ron and Hermione talking privately of his betrayal and if she could ever forgive him.


Title: Broken

Fandom:Harry Potter

Characters: Hermione and Ron

Prompt: 8 - Weeks

Word Count: 1589

Rating: T

Summary: Hermione's thoughts after Ron has returned to them on the Horcrux hunt as well as a missing moment of Ron and Hermione talking privately of his betrayal.

Author's Notes: The prompt immediately brought this moment to mind. It's really the only option since she's shouting the prompt word at him over and over ya know. It was a struggle though, I didn't just want to use the dialog from the book with Hermione's thoughts instead of Harry's. Also, you know that R/Hr have tons of moments with out Harry there and I wanted to write the moment Hermione begins to forgive him for walking out.

Broken

Hermione lay on her bunk, letting the anger fester inside of her as she nestled into the blankets protecting her from the chill winter air. _Weeks_, he had been gone for _weeks_! She recalled the hopeful smile as he'd first looked at her. In that moment she knew bliss. He was alive, all the nights she had cried at the terrible knowledge they would never see each other again, they were for nothing because he was there, just a few feet away from her.

She tried to remember that feeling of joy and hope that only his presence could bring to her life but just as in that moment the feeling had been overcome she was overcome now. He'd left them. He'd left her. She could more easily remembered the heartache than the joy. The icy rain drops pelting her as she ran after him. Her endless screaming making her horse as she wandered the woods looking for him. The sharp pricks of long thorns tearing at her flesh as she frantically searched. It had been for nothing, she had seen no trace of him. He had left with out a second glance.

Tears filled her eyes against her will. She didn't want to feel this for him, he didn't deserve it. She remembered the look of accusation in his eyes as he declared _'I get it. You choose him.' _Those words ripped at her, cut deeper than any of the stinging barbs they had exchanged in their numerous arguments, hurt more than any passionate embrace she had been forced to bear witness him share with another. Her ears perked at Ron's voice whispering something to Harry across the room.

"Could've been worse. Remember those birds she set on me?" His comment enraged her, his betrayal had been so much more this time. She should do worse than those damn canaries. He _deserved_ worse than those damn canaries.

"I still haven't ruled it out," she muttered from beneath her blankets. _'Hope he sleeps with one eye open from now on, that would show him.'_

Silence settled upon them again. Harry dressed as quickly and as quietly as humanly possible. She had a suspicion he was attempting to be invisibility among the tangible animosity hanging in the air. She allowed herself a small smile at his predicament. It was obvious he was please with Ron's return. He'd been able to forgive him instantly with no any hesitation. Harry truly was a remarkable person being able to move past such a betrayal without a second thought.

There was that whole _'saved my life'_ thing he'd been so adamant about. It probably helped the process out a bit. Part of her wished she'd been drowning that pond just so he could save her and she could feel right with him like Harry so obviously did. She frowned at herself, angry she could even wish it. He had betrayed her, more deeply than Harry knew, than possibly even Ron knew. He hadn't just walked out, he'd sullied forever years of moments she had treasured in her heart.

Her name falling off his lips in a sore rasp as he lay unconscious in the hospital wing on his last birthday. The feel of his skin beneath her lips as she kissed his cheek before his first Quidditch match their 5th year. His touch sending a rush a goose bumps along her skin as they brushed hands while studying. His predatory stare as she danced with Victor at the Yule ball. Long moments of watching him look at her from the corner of her eyes, hoping he would make any sort of move to bring them closer. These moments and thousands of others she'd picked apart and analyzed in her quest to decipher his feelings toward her. Those moments had held solace for her wounded heart all the times they had come so close and yet crumbed to bits. They were all tainted now with bitterness and distrust.

He had left her.

He had left her broken.

***

It was in the middle of the night several nights later, Hermione was on watch in by the entrance of the tent, one flap exposing the area outside. She had a copy of the _'Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore' _and wasstudying the photograph of the handwritten exchange he's penned in his youth when a noise from behing caught her attention. She turned to find Ron, clad in his maroon pajamas approaching her tentatively. She turned her attention back to her book without a word. She did her best to master her emotions, relaxing her muscles to ensure nothing was visible in her expression. She saw him in her peripheral vision lower himself onto the floor on the other side of the unopened flap. They sat like that in silence for several long and uncomfortable minutes.

"I couldn't sleep," he muttered. Hesitantly breaking the tension hanging thick between them.

She said nothing, giving up no signs she'd even heard him. There was another long silence and if she couldn't see him still staring at her from the edge of her vision she might have thought he'd sulked back to bed.

"Please Hermione," her name from his lips a desperate plea. "I've spent weeks with your voice screaming at me in my head and I don't know if I live with the silence any longer." She could see him playing with the tattered hem of his pajamas with his long freckled fingers. "Please, yell at me. Tell me what an coward I am, scream at me for being a horrible friend or that you always knew I'd walk out on you," he trailed off and when it picked back up again his voice was barely a whisper, "just _please_ say something."

"You're an arse!" She didn't look up from her book but she could see the joy on Ron's face at her words and it made her want to smack the grin right off him. "It takes a special kind of horrible to do what you did to me, to us." Hermione's didn't know if she meant '_us_' her and Harry or _'us' _in her and Ron.

"I know." His face was solemn again. She didn't want his acceptance though. She wanted him to fight, to disagree with her so she could force him to see how right she was. It was infuriating that he just accepted it without letting her to make him see exactly how wrong he was.

"Do you? Do you really?" She finally lifted her eyes from the book she'd stopped reading the moment he sat down. "You did exactly what Peter Pettigrew did. Betrayed his best friends the moment it became too much, too hard. No wonder you got along with the little rat for so long. Why should we trust you at all? You don't deserve it, you've proven exactly how little we should trust you. James and Lily Potter, Sirius, Lupin they're lives were all destroyed by an unworthy friend who betrayed them. How do I know that I'm not watching Harry repeat their mistake?" She'd meant for her words to bite and sting, to rip at him like the brambles she stumbled into as she searched for him all those weeks ago but she was unprepared for the sorrow and anguish that transformed his features. She was surprised when pity washed over her instead of satisfaction at his pained expression.

Silence stretched again and she watched as Ron's eyes closed tightly. Fighting the tears that eventually spilled over. She hated herself for saying it, but she hated him more for making it necessary. She watched his struggles silently, until the shame became too much. It was a long time before he spoke and when he did his voice was uneven and strained.

"I'll leave if you think it's best. I wouldn't, well I couldn't bear it if not being able to count on me got either of you killed." His voice broke at these last words and more tears spilled down his freckled cheeks. The silence waited on her this time and she fought with the decision before her. Could one moment of abandonment wipe away the years that had passed before it?

He had been there for her since he rescued her from a mountain troll seven years ago. He'd stared down his worst fear in hopes of saving her, vomited slugs for her, stood between her and what he'd thought at the time was a deranged blood thirsty murderer. He'd placed himself as her protector more times than she could tally. Even when they were fighting, when they hadn't spoke for months she'd known deep down if she ever needed to, she could trust him with her life. Could she still?

She couldn't quantify why, but she knew the answer. It would take time for her broken heart to heal, it was possible she might never trust him with her friendship again. But her life, she knew she could place her life in his hands a thousand times over and he would never let any damage reach her without first laying down his own.

"Stay," she whispered plea was soft and nervous. His gaze meet hers and she felt the tears pooled in her eyes coming over down her cheeks in droves. "I would like it very much if you stayed." Neither of them looked away and she knew as his eyes gazed longingly into her own that she'd forgive him one day. Not today, but someday.


End file.
